A busy week ahead

[aries_buckhorn]

Another day of going to bed after breakfast.
To my defense I was woken by one of the cats at seven and was wide awake. It didn't last, though, so I had to take a nap. I'm still in pain from cramps but I hope it's gone by tomorrow, where I have a dentist appointment.
I'm dying. My anxiety can't handle it. But it's the last time this time. I somehow went three years without going, and boy did I regret it. Stupid mental health, stupid weak teeth. Thanks mom and dad for another batch of bad genes.

After a nap, lunch and painkillers, I was ready for some fresh air and hubby, the dog and I went for a walk in a large forest. It's a very nice walk, clocking 7 kilometers. The weather was warm and sunny and honestly, I just love being outside.

I have to remember to water all my new plants tonight, btw. I'm trying to make the garden more flowery, right now it's mostly grass, moss and weeds. I hope in a couple of years it's more of an insect heaven.

This coming week is gonna be tough. Dentist tomorrow, dog training Tuesday, online Warhammer rp Wednesday and I'm gonna be GM Friday. And we're talking about visiting a small zoo not too far away Saturday.

At least May looks pretty relaxed so far (famous last words). My mom is coming for a weekend (a looong weekend) and I have to travel a bit for the big city - my drivers license is about to expire and needs a renewal. So far it's been every two years because of my diabetes, but I hope it's five yeas this time. It's a pain in the ass and expensive. First I have to go to my doctor for a doctor's note and then I have to go in person to the office that handles drivers licenses. Sigh.
I wish I had my own damn car, but we can only afford one and my hubby needs it to get to work, so I have to travel with public transport, which is shit this far out on the countryside.

Oh, and I need a haircut. Desperately.

And then I've been invited to visit a friend at their house!
I can't remember the last time that happened. I mean, I sometimes visit my best friend, but she's more like a sister anyways.
It sounds so sad, but it's just the way it is, I'm not looking for sympathy. Friends just isn't my strong suite and the few I have live far away.

I could rant a lot about it, but there's two sayings I would like to point out: "If everything smells like shit, it's probably you" (me) and "I'm sorry if my mental health made me a bad friend."
And then I would like to say: I've been very unlucky. I apparently seem like a person who will take your shit, and I'm not. I'd rather be alone than handle your drama.

I've lost a couple of circles through my life. The last big one was a few years ago, it was pretty toxic and I'm very happy not to be a part of it anymore, but I haven't recovered from it yet.
Hopefully one day I will.

Oh well. I know the friend I'm going to visit in May is reading this, and I hope she doesn't gets scared away. Sorry 'bout the rant.

Living with undiagnosed autism and ADHD has been hard, and I'm getting better. A little by little. Now I know.

Oh well!

I still haven't written anything. I'm scared. What if I just hit the wall, hate it and just can't. I really need to find the love for my trade again.
Maybe I should just... write the first sentence and see what happens after that. I mean, I know what happens to Tjesin, but, you know, what happens to me!

Okay. I'm gonna try. It's that or Sun Haven, and honestly, I'm not that big of a fan using all my time playing computer. It's unproductive, though pretty good for realxing and resting a tired mind.

Tjesin! Let's mistreat you! Come here boy!